PanamaTimes

Thursday, Mar 12, 2026

Jonathan Pie: Welcome to London laundromat, a one-stop corruption shop for anyone who needs to hide their money away

87,000 homes in Britain were bought through offshore companies by anonymous millionaires. At least 1.5 billion pounds’ worth of those are owned by Russians with direct links to the Kremlin. London is the money-laundering capital of the world, bar none. It’s the only industry we have left. Without it, we’d just be a car park for France.

For 20 years, Putin has been using illicit money to fund an oligarchy of billionaires, to keep his corrupt regime in power.

And for 20 years, those Kremlin-approved oligarchs have been coming here to invest their ill-gotten gains via a loophole that allows people to buy property in the U.K. anonymously.

“These are homes valued at tens of millions of pounds, a cluster of Russian jewels.”

Welcome to Londongrad, Moscow-on-Thames.
Eighty-seven thousand homes in Britain were bought through offshore companies by anonymous millionaires.

At least 1.5 billion pounds’ worth of those are owned by Russians with direct links to the Kremlin. London is the money-laundering capital of the world, bar none.

What an accolade.
The London laundromat, a one-stop corruption shop for anyone who needs to hide their money away with no questions asked.

We have let it happen for years, because it’s how the U.K. makes money.

It’s the only industry we have left. Without it, we’d just be a car park for France.
Open Britain, where anyone — arms dealer, drug dealer, people trafficker, warlord or, in this case, hundreds of Kremlin-backed millionaires — can rinse their dirty money clean by buying up the most expensive houses in London and, for the most part, leaving them empty, which inflates the market so much that the rest of us have to sell a kidney just
to buy a shed.

This is the legendary UK commentator, Jonathan Pie.

The British version of the American George Carlin.


In response to Russia’s invasion of Ukraine, governments are taking aim at the superwealthy with close ties to Vladimir Putin, hitting them with sanctions, cutting off their access to offshore wealth, seizing their luxury yachts and villas and generally making it difficult to be a filthy rich person.

But in the Opinion Video above, Jonathan Pie, the fictional broadcast journalist played by the comedian Tom Walker, argues that even while the United States and the European Union have come down hard on Russian oligarchs, Britain has taken a gentler approach. This response, he argues, is the result of a dark symbiotic relationship that the country has developed with ill-gotten Russian money.

For years, Russian wealth has poured into Britain with few questions asked, helping to finance political campaigns and buoying the luxury property market. Russian oligarchs have been so happy to avail themselves of Britain’s laissez-faire regulatory climate to park their wealth and launder dirty money that the nation’s capital has earned the moniker Londongrad.

And that, Pie argues, is why the British government has been reluctant to step up the pressure on the Russian elite. Stronger sanctions, he argues, would risk hurting Britain even more than they would Putin and his cronies.

“And this was Putin’s plan all along,” Pie asserts. “For 20 years, he’s been slowly neutralizing us as a threat — by using our own greed against us.”

Jonathan Pie videos were previously licensed to RT — formerly known as Russia Today — in the U.K. Mr. Walker has never worked for the network and has had no relationship with it since 2016.

Featuring Jonathan Pie, a fictional newscaster created by the British comedian Tom Walker: https://www.youtube.com/c/jonathanpie

Subscribe: http://bit.ly/U8Ys7n
More from The New York Times Video: http://nytimes.com/video

Newsletter

Related Articles

PanamaTimes
0:00
0:00
Close
President Trump warns countries against abandoning recent trade deals with the US
Unitree Robotics founder Wang Xingxing showcases future robot deployment during Spring Festival Gala.
Cuba adopts electric tricycles for transport amid fuel shortages
Cuba's fuel crisis leads to mounting waste in Havana
Eighty-Year-Old Lottery Winner Sentenced to 16.5 Years for Drug Trafficking
UK Green Party Considering Proposal to Legalize Heroin for an Inclusive Society
Investigation Launched at Winter Olympics Over Ski Jumpers Injecting Hyaluronic Acid
Wall Street Erases All Gains of 2026; Bitcoin Plummets 14% to $63,000
Cuba Warns It Has Only Weeks of Oil Remaining as US Pressure Tightens
The AI Hiring Doom Loop — Algorithmic Recruiting Filters Out Top Talent and Rewards Average or Fake Candidates
WhatsApp Develops New Meta AI Features to Enhance User Control
U.S. winter storm triggers 13,000-plus flight cancellations and 160,000 power outages
America’s Venezuela Oil Grip Meets China’s Demand: Market Power, Legal Shockwaves, and the New Rules of Energy Leverage
There is no sovereign immunity for poisoning millions with drugs.
President Trump Says United States Will Administer Venezuela Until a Secure Leadership Transition
Delta Force Identified as Unit Behind U.S. Operation That Captured Venezuela’s President
Trump Announces U.S. Large-Scale Strike on Venezuela, Declares President Maduro and Wife Captured
The Pilot Barricaded Himself in the Cockpit and Refused to Take Off: "We Are Not Leaving Until I Receive My Salary"
Hackers Are Hiding Malware in Open-Source Tools and IDE Extensions
White House launches ‘Hall of Shame’ site to publicly condemn media outlets for alleged bias
Families Accuse OpenAI of Enabling ‘AI-Driven Delusions’ After Multiple Suicides
Maduro Tightens Security Measures as U.S. Strike Threat Intensifies
U.S. Issues Alert Declaring Venezuelan Airspace a Hazard Due to Escalating Security Conditions
A Decade of Innovation Stagnation at Apple: The Cook Era Critique
Nancy Pelosi Finally Announces She Will Not Seek Re-Election, Signalling End of Long Congressional Career
Erling Haaland’s Remarkable Run: 13 Premier League Goals in 10 Matches and Eyes on History
White House Refutes Reports That US Targeting Military Sites in Venezuela
Hurricane Melissa Strikes Cuba After Devastating Jamaica With Record Winds
U.S. Targets Maritime Narco-Routes While Border Pressure to Mexico Remains Limited
Argentina’s Markets Surge as Milei’s Party Secures Major Win
U.S. Treasury Sanctions Colombia’s President Gustavo Petro over Drug-Trafficking Allegations
‘I Am Not Done’: Kamala Harris Signals Possible 2028 White House Run
Ecuadorian President Daniel Noboa Alleges Poison Plot via Chocolate and Jam
Trump Accuses Colombia’s President of Drug-Leadership and Announces End to US Aid
"The Tsunami Is Coming, and It’s Massive": The World’s Richest Man Unveils a New AI Vision
U.S. Treasury Mobilises New $20 Billion Debt Facility to Stabilise Argentina
A Dollar Coin Featuring Trump’s Portrait Expected to Be Issued Next Year
Trump Stands Firm in Shutdown Showdown and Declares War on Drug Cartels — Turning Crisis into Opportunity
FBI Strikes Deep in Maduro’s Financial Web with Bold Money-Laundering Indictments
Sean ‘Diddy’ Combs Sentenced to Fifty Months in Prison Following Prostitution Conviction
New World Screwworm Creeps Within Seventy Miles of U.S. Border, Threatening Cattle Sector
Colombian President Petro Vows to Mobilize Volunteers for Gaza and Joins List of Fighters
Trump Orders Third Lethal Strike on Drug-Trafficking Vessel as U.S. Expands Maritime Counter-Narcotics Operations
US Launches New Pilot Program to Accelerate eVTOL Air Taxi Deployment
New OpenAI Study Finds Majority of ChatGPT Use Is Personal, Not Professional
Actor, director, environmentalist Robert Redford dies at 89
Florida Hospital Welcomes Its Largest-Ever Baby: Annan, Nearly Fourteen Pounds at Birth
Could AI Nursing Robots Help Healthcare Staffing Shortages?
In a politically motivated trial: Bolsonaro Sentenced to 27 Years for Plotting Coup After 2022 Defeat
In a highly politically motivated trial, Brazil’s Supreme Court finds former leader Bolsonaro guilty of plotting coup
×